Uneven Flow

I feel like I have moving through a strange curve of events, that are leading to places that I am, quite frank, a little confused about. I manage to find myself in these intriguing situations time and again, and the difficulty I am met with is making sense of knowledge from the last to apply to the present. I'm just hoping it will flow back in naturally, and I'll be able to make the most of it.

Why do I write so cryptically in a journal meant to remind me of things years down the road? Maybe I'm not so intent on remembering.
Speaking of which, I was coasting across my old Xanga this morning in hopes of finding a recipe, which I was unable to located. I did, however, noticed that for a while I had this trend of posting a daily highlight. I think that's something I should get back into. It would keep the days from fading away. The objective is to make them unique, to remind yourself that every day is different, and brings something new. The problem is with blogging in the middle of the day, when new and wonderful things can still happen. I wonder if that would make the optimal writing time just before you go to sleep?

Today's Highlight: We're getting better at Halo 3. Long has it been since our Halo days, but Chris has (perhaps inadvertently) brought it back to us. And now, we hunger for battle constantly.

It's just a state of mind.

It's like every word I'd ever heard was bouncing around in my head, echoing in a massive, empty room that only I stood in. So many of their words I choose to ignore, thinking I knew better, that I had a grasp and control of this situation. I've played the pawn to my desires. I'm weak to it, and I let go; thinking, perhaps, that I would get some joy or ecstasy out of it...but it never works out that way. It always comes back to where it began, and the error of your ways sits before you, and you've got a choice of trying something different...but you don't do it, do you. Insanity. That's what we are. That's what I am. Insane to expect different outcomes from the same approach. Insane....huh....Sadly not as surprising as it should be.

Vacation is Over

I feel like I haven't done anything in days. I've spent too long at the condo, getting too relaxed. I've got so much work, so many things to do that I just have not addressed. That's the problem with my airy attitude: nothing bothers me, even the fact that I'm not getting my work done. But what did I do?

Tuesday...oh yeah, I voted. And I did my homework that morning before class. Maybe I wasn't as lazy as I thought. I had some trouble locating the voting center, as I rode past the road that connected to it. It was much more bike ride than I had bargained for, but it was worth it, of course. Oxford is so hilly, and my bike's gears are all messed up. My chain ring is sort of ghetto-rigged and the increments on my cassette are all messed up, so the chain falls off if I shift into the lowest gearing. Isn't that awesome? You'd think I'd fix it. You'd think I'd fix a lot of things immediately, given my philosophy...but we can't always be true to our thoughts.

Wednesday : I watched Fern Gully : The Last Rain Forest. I've had bad experiences with re-watching movies from my youth, but this went incredibly well. I also wanted to cook a movie themed meal, and decided that smoke would be the best flavor to make the connection. For that, I decided some planked fish would be the way to go. That, of course, need not stand alone. I spent quite a while trying to think up and prepare the ingredients, as they called for a few hours of prep. I went exploring town for a plank to use, and I found a wonderful little specialty store called "Mississippi Madness" It is located on the square and opens to a selection of locally crafted pottery, which was interesting, but not what I was after. I took a trip to the back and saw a sign that read "Culinary Gadgets and Gizmos Downstairs". Sounds like my place! I went down to find a treasure trove of customary tools that I didn't know were available in town. And to think, I practically found it by accident (I was referred by a guy from the lumber yard that didn't have what I needed).

I feel like what I'm writing is pointless. Am I writing just to write? Does it really matter?

So, perhaps it wasn't quite as uneventful as I'd suspected...but now it is time to focus, for the is much to be done.

I used to wait for goodbye.

Now I walk away.